Monday, October 20, 2008


The audio is pretty crappy, but Jon Stewart, while not under the language contracts of his Comedy Central show, tells Sarah Palin how it really is in a stand-up show for college audiences in Boston on Friday, October 17, 2008. Thank Gosh for Jon Stewart:

Transcribed as best I can:

"He [McCain] made an interesting vice presidential choice.

I like "the woods"... [I like..uh...] I just don't know if I would pull my vice president out of the woods randomly.

She's [great]... she went out today again. She was talking to a small town, she said that [it's the] small towns she really likes going to because that's the pro-America part of the country.

You know, I just want to say to her, just very quickly..."Fuck you."

I've never seen someone with a greater disparity between how cute they sound when they're saying something and how terrible what they're saying is.

"Don't ya know, Obama, he just, by golly, he just is a terrorist? [...] What? Oh, you know, he just, gosh, kills babies, you know."

I'm so over the idea that only small-town America is the heart and soul. You know what small-town America is? It's the same as cities. Cities are just lots of towns piled on top of each other in one place.

They have this whole thing that somehow we can write off entire swaths of the country, that we somehow... You know, New York City was good enough for fucking Osama bin Laden, it better be good enough for you.

I can't take it anymore. [...] After eight years of this divisiveness, we're back to this idea that only small-town America is the real America. That the other parts of America...

You know, I get it. I'm from New York. [...] We have a lot of gay people. [...] But homosexuals don't have sodomy on top of Russian flags."